I truly believe that every person I meet matters and has something to offer... No matter how harsh they may seem... I try to chip away at the beauty the years may bury and the sparkle time tries to take away...
I just spent twenty minutes sitting in the dark looking out my window at the stars. They're bright tonight, or maybe I just haven't paid attention lately...who knows...
As dark and mysterious it can seem, as simple and warm and wonderous, always changing Just like the seasons, just like our age. A continuous constant with linear lessons and rollercoaster feelings... The world is an infinite place. It`s a lot to handle at times. How different my parents are. I look at them for So much but somewhere along the way I learned to really see. They will never be Mommy and Daddy again, Never Chris and Diane. With time I began to see that relationships change and grow. Change and lose the allure Of what used to be. That`s just life. As always, cèst la vie. Although in a lot of ways I think that's bullcrap...
You choose to be with someone. Make the choice to stand side by side and look outwards together. Face the world. Whether it be romantic or friendship some things just aren't worth being unhappy about. Easier said than done! It sneaks up and takes over without you even realizing it's happening. Sometimes You don't want to be there, wherever there is. Take a moment. Take a look. See what's really around, Who's around. What you're doing, who you're doing it with... All the things you can be doing, will be doing, Working towards doing. How it just might come together. When it kicks you and you find yourself so stuck, So sullen, so lost, having someone, anyone, to listen to you and then attempt to set your ass straight again By telling u how amazing you are, how amazing life is, how a little effort, and a few good meaningful hugs Just may have a shot with putting u on your way again. No one can do it alone no matter how strong they Think they are. Action is better than dreams. Dreams are better than motions. So dream and act upon them. When the dream begins to fade, reflect on the story you've created for, thinking of how you want it to end...
A loving heart is the truest wisdom. A heart that refuses to turn to stone. A heart that is willing to give. A heart that beats with the faith that one day you will touch the sky and this would have been worth it...
That moment when your body goes numb and nothing matters except making the pain go away. Shit gets real after awhile but life goes on. We can't ever lose sight of that. There's no respect for those who just give up because through every dark night comes a brighter day.
Sometimes we run into the people we used to be. For a few minutes It's like you never changed but then you snap back to reality Questioning the life you know now and why it all played out this way.
Is it possible to hate yourself for missing someone so much? Can you hate yourself For going insane when you're not capable of talking to someone? I'm pissed off that I have allowed myself to get to the point where it drives me crazy whenever I can't talk... How do you get so attached to someone? I don't know what just happened.. I flipped... But most of all mad for not being able to go a certain amount of time without talking...
Currently headed back into downtown. I had a great night at the lake overall, Probably shouldn't have had so much to drink though. Today should be a chill day...
My parents still make such an effort to maintain the bond we've always had. It's great. It's something that they've taught me to appreciate. A lot of kids don't spend nearly Half as much time with their parents like Jake and I do. It's truly a blessing...